The necessary judgment and the one to avoid

Without shadow of doubt, creatures, the human being cannot help but judge; provided that by "judging" one intends to form an opinion of the relationship between oneself and the environment external to him, that is, between the individual and what he is experiencing; be this a social situation, or an interpersonal relationship.
Your whole life is made up of an uninterrupted chain of judgments, from when you open your eyes in the morning and look in the mirror - and already there you make a judgment about yourself - to arrive at the moment when you close those eyes and, maybe , before falling asleep, think back to what happened during the day and waste a few moments (and it would be good if you did it more often!) to express within yourself comments - and therefore judgments - on what you experienced during the day .
So - I repeat - it is impossible for the human being not to make judgments. What is it, then, that you must not do? How should our saying to you “do not judge” be interpreted in the most precise way if we ourselves then come to tell you, confusing your ideas a little, that you cannot help but judge?

The fact is that your trying to have an opinion towards other people almost always boils down to issuing a verdict; it is not an observation by trying to be objective on known data, but the issuance of a verdict, most of the time negative, on other people.
This is perhaps what should most be indicated as wrong in judging. The reasons why this verdict should not be issued are evident and manifold from the many things we have told you over the years; how can you pass a verdict without knowing what the other individual's motives were, how can you judge someone guilty if you don't know why he did what he is accused of, how can you claim the right to judge someone else when do you not have a clear conscience - most likely - of the same guilt that is attributed to the other?
This, as you have pointed out, is a point to keep in mind when making judgments about other people, since - as you have said - the others are here to act as a mirror, what you notice in them is something that resonates in you too; just the fact that you notice that particular and not another, that behavior and not another, means that it has aroused in you reactions, emotions which, therefore, in some way, find a resonance within you.

Here, then, is how it is possible to go back from the judgment made towards others, to the judgment towards sé themselves; you have underlined this, you have not understood it but, at least, "known"; certainly, the effort represented by the attempt to overcome theIo who wants to put himself one step above the others, is always so strong that he ends up leading you to issue a verdict, becoming judges and not sharing in the sin of others.

Now, "not judging" differs when the human being, the individual, is observed in the closest interpersonal relationships, or is observed in the relationship with others within the society in which he is living. It is obvious, it is evident that, in order to lead a social life, one must try to comply with certain rules - right or wrong they are - put in place in order to achieve a useful, pleasant and as satisfying as possible coexistence for all individuals. .
To this end, it is also equally evident that - as our friend said - in the workplace one is led to make judgments on one's comrades knowing who can be trusted to carry on the work, who maybe (as you say) " it marches a bit ”, of those who are not 100% reliable and therefore can create problems, of those who pocket a few bribes, and on and on and on.
Now, this type of judgments should necessarily, or inevitably, be based as much as possible on real data of the individual's behavior, without taking into account more than much the possible motivations of the individuals - since, in this case, if one taking into account all the reasons why an individual does something, anyone would be excused and justified - but, with the intention of safeguarding the good of many other individuals, it is possible to make a judgment and keep it in mind when evaluating the people with whom the social life and, perhaps, a work activity. Agree on this?

Certainly, when we talk about interpersonal relationships - and here, in this case, we are talking about relationships with the closest people, who live emotional, mental, affective experiences with each of you - it is no longer a "cold working relationship", a utilitarian relationship in the name of the greatest good for society, but it is instead constituted by an exchange between people.
And the judgment should mainly be interpreted as a way to implement an exchange: “I think that you, comrade who are next to me, have a problem of some kind; maybe I'm wrong in thinking I recognize your problem, maybe I'm wrong in my way of trying to help you solve it, however, according to the idea that I have formed, according to the opinion that I inevitably have of what your needs are, I can - and not only can, but I must - try to meet you and make you understand what you should do, in my opinion, to change your way of being, which I believe, in that case, is wrong".

"In my opinion”, This you always forget in making your judgments.
Your judgment is usually final, it is absolute; you are all "Solomons" who have the truth in their hands and who do not understand why others do not receive it as a grace, even feeling enlightened by your judgments on them!
In short, judging, in addition to all the things you have said, is so often also identified with a great lack of humility on the part of those who judge; and this, in a true relationship between people which is always an equal give-and-take, can only be harmful in the end.